The “But… He’s Just Mailing It In From Vacation!!!” Edition Of The Thursday Beery News Notes

Yup. Big news this week? I am trying to nap in as many spots in the house or out in the yard as I can. I’ve yet to try that awkward chair in the back rec room but I still have my eye on it. It’s all so pleasant. The evening air is now cool enough that you can hear the crickets across the backyard fences over because no one is running an air conditioner anymore. Fact is I haven’t had a week off with nothing to do for quite a while and, I gotta say, I am liking it. Regular readers may tell you that I am good at doing nothing but I just don’t get to do it… or, rather, not do it… enough. So far I’ve dozed to baseball on half the waking hours, “worked” on cleaning up the garden and exhausting myself planting a few more seeds in a few more pots with something to eat before the frosts close in, gawked at a double rainbow – and even put on a belt to hit a BBQ place on a Monday night where I found a shot of Makers Mark to sit next to my pint.

Speaking of bourbon in Canada, Jeff did some solid inquiring into the effects of the chill in Canadian-US relations as it applies to booze. As I have mentioned a few times, up here our provincially run booze systems (other than the Randians in charge of Failberta and Assbackchawan) have taken all US booze off the shelves. Jeff shared what that looks likes from the south:

California Cabernets, Oregon IPAs, and Kentucky bourbons are all world-class beverages, but they’re not irreplaceable. Companies spend years or decades building the reputation for these categories and promoting their own brands. Trump’s tariffs have interrupted the work of these industries, and now Canadians are playing the field and experimenting with other products—ones they may enjoy as much or more than the American ones they’re replacing. That’s the first dynamic at play. The second is that now that those shelves are being filled by products elsewhere (whether domestic or imported), the U.S. companies will be forced to win them back should Canadians allow that, which as of this week they have agreed to do.

I am not sure that last comment is correct. This week our Prime Minister agreed to drop reciprocal tariffs on most goods covered by the existing pre-Orange free trade deal. But it’s the provincial premiers (other than those in Alber’duh and Sassblotchawhere) like Uncle Dougie who have taken all US booze off the shelves. And it matters. Ontario’s LCBO alone is the biggest booze buyer in the world. It’s also important to note that bourbon drinking up here is far behind our local rye – while much of the US wine (down 97.5% year over year) is bulk gak that’s been easily replaced by our own damn bulk gak sub-sector thanks very much. But the big point, as Jeff puts more nicely, is the Canadian “fuck ’em” factor. We don’t care to buy their booze (… or fresh veg… or BBQ sauce… or… anything) if we can find better friendlier sources. My Manhattan had Crown Royal in it. But, yes, I did have a Makers Mark on Monday after the staff checked that there still was some to be had. So there is that.

Next up… hey – did Stan just lay down another rule?

In my mind, more pounds of hops trumps more acres.

Because I am watching baseball all week, I am immersed in the stats and have to agree that units of production always is superior to quantity of resources. The Mets, for example, are up nere the top in terms of payroll in MLB but are fighting the Phillies this week just to make the playoffs. By contrast the Brewers – every one of youse’s favourite team, natch – have the most wins (as of last Sunday) but are #23 in the spending. This is why the stats over the last 20 years about brewery openings or other measurements* have never made much sense given they equate tiny taproom spots with production facilities. Not to mention how they were fueled by a certain level of fantasy.** Is more beer by volume being brewed and consumed? That’s the stat that matters.

And, putting together the right data as well, Merryn is “putting together papers for a bibliography on evidence for malt and ale” from early civilization – which is a great idea. But apparently an uphill battle:

I suppose, once you accept that spent grain aka draff aka brewer’s grains could have been fed to animals (eg cattle and pigs) in the Neolithic then it follows that you must accept that they were making malt and ale. And that is something that quite a few archaeologists do not want to accept

Merryn also gets the h/t to a story in The Scotsman about archaeological finds at a housing development in Fife which has revealed how far back housing developed at the site and perhaps what they were up to:

“I never liked the beer anyway” or “It tastes like piss” are standard responses to stories about BrewDog, as if the company’s ethics or culture can be tasted in the product. We suppose that is a logical extension of the idea that the products of virtuous breweries – those that are small, independent, craft, or whatever words you choose to use – taste better. We’re not sure it’s very helpful to dismiss specific beers because of politics, though, even if you might decide for other reasons not to buy or drink them. The idea of objectivity in beer tasting is pretty much a myth unless you go to extreme lengths but we should at least try to be honest and get close to the truth.

Punk IPA showed up in my Ontario marketplace back in 2009 at a moderately modest $2.60 – but they were advertisers back then so I really can’t say how I felt about it then, looking back from so many years later.*****  I am pretty sure that I liked the early strong stouts that they sent, back when their location still had “unit” in the address. But one thing I know I can depend on is Jess’s scientific findings. Punk IPA does not taste like piss.

Note: Katie has found a way to consolidate her archives.

Climate change driven news from Bordeaux as reported by Decanter:

The seismic decision, communicated in a letter from the Guinaudeau family on 24 August, was described as a necessary response to accelerating climate change and the increasing restrictions posed by the appellation system. ‘The vintages 2015, 2019, and above all 2022, were all strong evidence of [climate change]. 2025 goes a step further. We must think, readapt, act,’ the family wrote… Lafleur is the first of Bordeaux’s top tier, with six highly sought-after wines, to break with the AOC system – a move that underscores both the estate’s singular vision and the mounting pressures of climate change on traditional models.

My notes tell me I had a bottle of their accessible Chateau Grand Village 2020 in November 2022 and am pretty sure I was pretty pleased. As with “style” in beer these things ultimately get you only so far.

Not speaking German very much at all and not being an amateur statistician methodology protester with aspirations of being the voice of the brewing… err… hard drinks… err… fluid beverage marketplace,***** I was struck by this bit of Cento-Euro news as reported in The Times worthy of an extended quotation :

…a generation of unprecedentedly abstemious young Germans is causing serious trouble for the nation’s breweries. The market has been shrinking for some time at a relatively sedate pace of between 2 and 3 per cent a year, dragging even venerable brands such as Erdinger and Paulaner into a cut-throat price war that has brought retail prices as low as €0.80 for a half-litre. This year, however, the decline has accelerated. In the first six months, the German beer industry’s sales slumped by 6.3 per cent compared with the same period last year, excluding non-alcoholic products. It was the first time brewers had sold less than four billion litres in any six-month period since 1993… Today only 38 per cent of men under the age of 25 drink at least once a week, compared with 55 per cent a generation earlier and 85 per cent of young men in the mid-1970s. 

That last bit is a bit of a stunner. 62% of German young men not having a drink at least once a week. I poured myself another double Manhattan to take in these and other broader implications.* Will the great-grandkids hear stories about how Grandpa drank stuff with this weird chemical solvent in it and then wrote about it publicly? As if it made me happy? Will it be like when our kids heard about how my father as a 1930s kid was sent to the pharmacist to fill the glass box with acid to bring home to make the radio run? Could be. Maybe. You know, it could be a bit comforting to be an evolutionary dead ender clinky-clink-wise.

Speaking of end times, the nueuws in gueuze is not going to ameuese:

AB InBev has announced that it will no longer brew Belle-Vue Gueuze because demand for the beer has dwindled. A company spokesperson confirmed the news on Monday following a report by De Tijd, adding that production of Belle-Vue Kriek at the Sint-Pieters-Leeuw brewery will continue. Belle-Vue Gueuze was originally created by Constant Vanden Stock, a brewer who later became chairman of football club RSC Anderlecht. After taking over his family’s brewery post-World War II, he introduced a sweeter gueuze to the market. Traditionally, gueuze beer was known for its sour taste and often served with sugar cubes. 

Me, I checked the archives and I don’t think I ever wrote about this beer – but the obit is not really the points. It’s that line “…often served with sugar cubes…” Does anyone ever do that? I mean in the drive for authenticity that has, you know, ushered good beer to an early retirement, has / does anyone drink traditional dry gueuzes and lambics like they were consumed… traditionally?

And, finally, the Pellicle feature comes from the Auld Country and is all about what was so well stated by author and fellow Strathclyde alumni Rob MacKay***** “…one of several national drinks…” Tennent’s:

“There’s an omnipresence to Tennent’s,” says David Freer, managing director of O Street, a Glasgow-based design agency. “People like it because it’s an institution; Tennent’s is always there,” David tells me. “I remember—and we’ve all done this in Scotland—driving into a weird town or village you’ve not been before, not knowing where to go, and seeing the glowing red T.” These illuminated signs can be found from the farthest reaches of the Highlands and Islands, all the way down to the borders, poking out above the door of hundreds of pubs along the way. They provide a comforting reassurance that even in an unfamiliar drinking spot, you’re going to know at least one thing on the menu.

You can get that at the LCBO, you know. Might have to find me some. And… that’s it for now. I am, after all, on vacation this last week of August. While you practice your Labour Day carols, please also check out Boak and Bailey every Saturday and sign up for their entertaining footnotes, too. Look out for Stan when he feels the urge now that he’s retired from Monday slot… maybe … maybe not. Then listen to a few of that now newly refreshed Lew’s podcasts and get your emailed issue of Episodes of my Pub Life by David Jesudason on certain Fridays. And Phil Mellows is at the BritishBeerBreaks. Once a month, Will Hawkes issues his London Beer City newsletter and do sign up for Katie’s wonderful self-governing totes autonomous website featuring The Gulp, too.  Ben’s Beer and Badword is out there with the all the sweary Mary! And check out the Atlantic Canada Beer Blog‘s weekly roundup. There is new reading at The Glass which is going back to being a blog. Any more? We have Ontario’s own A Quick Beer featuring visits to places like… Michigan! All About Beer offers a range of podcasts and there’s also The Perfect Pour. Plus follow the venerable Full Pint podcast! And there’s the Craft Beer Channel on Youtube. Check out the archives of the Beer Ladies Podcast. That’s quite good and after a break they may well be are back every month! Such is life. Such is beer podcasting and newslettering… which, as Ray says, are blogs! And he’s right.

*See BMI this week, for example: “…Craft $$ (excluding non-alc) declined 3.4% with volume down 5.8% for 4 wks compared to total beer $$ down just 1.6%, volume down 3.3%. So craft shed 0.17 share of beer $$ and 0.13 share of volume. But both FMBs and hard seltzer $$ sales were down at a steeper rate following FMB’s more recent twist of fate. FMB $$ dipped 3.6%, -0.21 share, while hard seltzer was down 3.7%, -0.15 pts. Craft continues to lose far less share at retail than (combined) FMB/seltzer category lately. Especially when factoring in craft NAs. Premium segment still lost biggest chunk of beer share, -0.8 pts, as $$ sales slipped 5% for 4 wks…” Share… jeesh. 
**Looking for reference to the late Dr Patrick McGovern, whose work I found a bit sus but classic for the times, I came across this glorius bit of 2012 era bullshit about not towing the line from a now long sold out brewery owner: “…The more often the Beer Advocate community becomes a soap box for outing breweries for daring to grow beyond its insider ranks the more it will be marginalized in the movement to support, promote, and protect independent American craft breweries…“
***Utilizing an excite-o-meter… or is it an excitometer… the result was “quite pleasant without being earth-shattering” or a 63 out of 87 or, for those of you working with the old scale, a 1.43. 
****I also really can’t figure out, after all this time, why the heck people paid me to run ads on this blog!
*****Too many to mention – but extra points for shoehorning in phrases like “among other shortcomings” and “preposterous”. See also the “BREAKING!” news that the MAGA right includes a significant segment of tea totaler social engineers, not to mention is led by one. I recall a decade and a half ago suggesting to the nearby NPR station that I am involved with that we might sponsor a craft beer and bluegrass event. Blank stares and shaking heads were followed by “you really are from Canada, aren’t you!”
******Question: does that rhyme with “ye bastard, yev gone a pit yer thumb in ma eye!“?