You, Sir, are a fool and a fascist! The day we agree to this proposal is the day I see you in rotting in the bowels of Hell!!!
Ian Doyle, Nfld Min of Finance, responding yesterday to the summit’s closing speech by First Minister Designate John McDonald MacKay Archibald
Emotions ran high this week at the end of the summit in Tantrama City on health issues which extended well past the original four days. Some progress was made but not in areas where great hope for a breakthrough had been expected.
Angry Crowds At Tantrama City Yesterday
Despite the hope and, then, demands of all four provincial premiers, representatives of the breakaway regions of Cape Breton, New Brunswick’s Acadian Penninsula and, to a lesser degree, the Souris Downtown Region (Alleged) as well as (beyond the security fencing) crowds which grew day by day, no further funding for health care was extended beyond the levels in place before the irrevocable extension of direct access to the Federal Treasury was granted by Federal Order in Council to the Tantrama City, granting First Minister Designate of the Provisional Government, John McDonald MacKay Archibald, what some – including he himself – have described as god-like powers.
Rather than announcing changes in health care funding in accordance with resolutions of the conference sesssions, First Minister Designate Archibald announced an elaborate plan of subsidized ferry and hydrofoil building for local transportation as a means to achieve self-sufficiency for the shipyards of the Northumberland Strait “for generations to come!” to the wild – some say intoxicated – applause for the delegates from the Souris Downtown Region (Alleged).
Calls of a legitimization of the new intermediary level of government through a ballot providing responsible government and a referendum on the policies proposed by the Provisional Government were met with little action. Meanwhile, officials from the four Provincial Premier’s offices reported no longer being able to contact the office of Federal Prime Minister Paul Martin or, even more oddly, the offices of Opposition co-Leaders Belinda Stronach and Peter MacKay. All recently published Federal literature, including maps indicate the region to the east of Edmunston, New Brunswick, as New Atlantica with the capital at Tantrama City. When questioned by these events, First Minister Designate Archibald announced that he would be undertaking a region wide series of “mussel, clam and lobster feeds or gobstuffs” in preparation for evaluation of the policy research opportunities required in order to lay the groundwork for plans for the first free election for New Atlantica:
Through meeting with supporters and perhaps others throughout the region and eating clams with them, it is the hope that the Provisional Government may lay the basis for the introduction…err… continuation…ummm…use of responsible government throughout the region as is enjoyed in…other places…I think.
The first in the series of Regional Feeds was announced late today for a series of villages from Tidnish to Pugwash along Nova Scotia’s North Shore with the theme “Hydrofoil Production and You.”
First Minister Designate Archibald, Left, Undertaking Provision Planning
For The Upcoming Regional Feeds Earlier Today