Second Gen (2003-2016, 2016- )
Nothing planned, lots of busy work, day before pay day – a lot of things conspire to make a day so dull you wish that you could relive the day they announced the Segway ’cause at least on that day hopes for a plan for world peace or limitless fuel were dashed by a goofball who thought we were all dying to riding around two-wheeled bread boxes with hockey sticks for handles.
I still have never seen one.
I just realized that I haven’t checked out my credit card reward points…for seven years.
“Bureautic” (pron. “byur-aw-tic”): used for “bureaucratic” but sort of merged in the pronunciation with “neurotic”.
Boing has a good post making fun of razor blade manufacturers given Gillette has now introduced a five-blade shaver because you know just scraping your face is so last year – everyone now is removing their faces day by day, one thin slice at a time.
I was thinking about how much I start at screens in the average day. Cathode ray tubes mainly. At work. At play.
But then I thought that that is not the true winner as most invasive modern trinket. It’s really the little plastic knob – the switch, the botton, the key, the slide, the thingie. Do the designers of these things ever get together either as an association or under an evil plan? They have virtually eliminated the toggle…what else?
Recently, I was at a meeting of people all fairly well known to each other where one person called another person “Jerry” when we all knew it was “Gary”. Although I have had the Hal/Al thing myself and not really been bothered as it is common enough when, instead, I watch it happening in front of me involving others I find it excruciating. I wonder why.
I am trying to find somthing to get me away from the gripping storyline of The Bachelor. I have watched too many reality show finals and I really did not care about any of them. Survivor was dullsville, Amazing Race is somewhat last week and later this week The Apprentice will still have a man with really funny hair on it who everyone treats like he invented beer but will take it all away if you cross him. All sugars, too. And you can’t even wish that you had the good old shows like The Rockford File ’cause you can actually watch them now in the 200 channel universe 24 hours a day and they are awful.
So – what do you do? You surf. And when you surf you come across moments in the life cycle of a topic like this:
Holy Moly! Real reality isn’t quite so dull but I am apparently going to die of everything all at once. That would be bad but it appears health is about bad stuff and there is plenty of it. Bad bad bad. I have no idea what the lady with the phone is smiling about. Maybe she is an urban phone user – her brain is safe. Whew Good. Or maybe she is a rural artist hoping something drastic can improve her style. Bad yet good. Just don’t drink beer and talk on the phone in the country. Bad. Your brain will be doomed. Bad bad bad. Best headline – “Toxic chemicals” in celebrities. That really has to suck:
Celeb-wannabe: So doctor…if I only want a little fame do I still need the big needle?
Doctor: I am afraid so.
Maybe it means celebrities are the source of toxic chemicals. That would be fairly freaky. I hope the celebrities stay away from my town.
So I get off the web and I find this in the file manager of the blog – I photo saved but I don’t think ever used. I look at it and I know Stephen Harper is listening to Aerosmith’s “Dude Looks Like a Lady” in his brain at that very moment. Right about the third chorus. Or he finally tried a beer. Nut-tay. He looks like his is trying to explain what it feels like, too.
But I suppose my day really went wrong when I sensed the end of the universe was truly nigh, knew secretly that monkey were flying out of private places everywhere and noted that the cow to moon ratio must be alarmingly high…all because in Nova Scotia the NDP propped up the Tory minority.
I’m with the kid in the back row: dress me up in grey, put a name tag around my neck, teach me the power salute and I’m still a bit sleepy when the rally begins. I’m still working out why these guys remind me of portland.
