Cheese Law

The hammer has fallen. There is no such thing as Yorkshire feta according to the braintrust at the EU:

A North Yorkshire food producer has revealed her disappointment after an EU ruling stopped her using the name “feta” on her locally-produced cheese. Judy Bell, who runs Shepherds Purse Cheeses near Thirsk, said she was not surprised by the ruling by the European Court of Justice. Mrs Bell’s business has been caught up in a five-year tussle within Europe over the feta name. But on Tuesday, judges ruled Greek feta had “Protected Designation of Origin”.

I want to be an EU “Protected Designation of Origin” cop. Right after I finish my career as a male model. Really, where do you sign up? I know I have been sullied by non-Greek feta my whole life and I know it is wrong. I want to change my ways. I want to slap down the Italian haggis cartel.